Cyril in My Kitchen Part II

cyril in a pan, originally uploaded by rhino75.

After last year's failed attempt to get French TV chef Cyril Lignac round to Rhino75 Towers, imagine my surprise and delight, dear reader, when I came across these "celebrity" pans in my local department store. Admittedly, it's not quite the same as having him come round to cook for you, but at least you don't have to tidy up before getting him out of the cupboard. Plus, Kitty can sit on his face while I make dinner. So everyone's happy.

Playing God

WHAT a week it's been, dear reader! First of all, dinner alongside Mia Farrow (that makes her sound like a ship, doesn't it?). Then the rugby - proof, if proof were needed, that sometimes that great English strategy of just "winging it" really is the best option. Grumpy old Chabal, the wild caveman, the supposed (my italics) baby-eater, spent most of his time on the floor, eating the TURF! Pffft. And to cap it all, Ma Rhino was viciously - there is no other adverb - attacked by... errm, a robin, and now has her arm in plaster. As always when emotions are running high, I decided to seek solace in a dark room full of strangers. No, not there - the THEATRE. As luck would have it, my friend Sandrine happens to be playing God at the moment. Literally. The show is called "Si ON n'existait pas" (their caps - for once!). Let me set the scene (ahem, ahem clears throat). ON decides to create a female companion for Adam, her firstborn, mainly to keep him away from the goats. But, unfortunately, Adam and Eve don't fancy each other at all. Enter Lily and .... oh but I'm telling you the plot!!! Go and see it - an original idea, great writing, lots of laughs, and top-notch performances. As a plus, the play also has original music, which you can purchase afterwards. The picture above (by yours truly) is of ON sitting on the bidet, trying to figure out what to do next - if that doesn't speak to us all, I don't know what does. (Click on the photo to see some more of my pics of the show).

BearForce1

Just when I was wondering what my next career move should be, I find these guys, who claim to be the world's "first true bear band." They also have a rather fab website. Marvellous. (via Absolument Gauthier)

Rhino75's Film Buff Teaser

Another classic movie moment, selflessly (my italics) recreated especially for YOU, dear reader, by the lovely Le Meg and myself - but which film is it?....

Cyril in My Kitchen

I'm positively brimming (my italics) with excitement, dear reader. Cyril Lignac, the French Jamie Oliver, is coming round to cook for me!! Ok ok, first of all I have to win this sandwich competition organised by the makers of luscious (worth a try) cream cheese Kiri, but surely that is merely a formality? Who, after all, could resist my triple-layer "Nutella, Marmite and banana" on polar bread special? It's been known to make a grown man (me) cry. It's certainly more original than anything Cyril himself has ever come up with. He "shot" to televisual fame by taking a group of unemployed people and teaching them how to cook (ooh reminds me of....oh yes, Jamie Oliver) and then set up his own restaurant called "15" (as did, who was it? Ah yes, Jamie Oliver). Ha, I hear you snort, I expect he'll be tackling school dinners next. Yes, that's right. Still, his recipes ARE different (more fiddly and restaurant-y than Jamie's, but not bad at all, particularly on the French classics). In the interests of fairness, I have an equal number of cookbooks by each, but my heart really belongs to Jamie. That said, however, he's not offering to come round and cook, is he? I wonder what I shall wear....?

Flying the Flag

"We're flying the flag all over the world, we're flying the flag for you." I wouldn't want you to think, dear reader, that I 've been slacking off during my stay at Castle Rhino in the U.K. Tonight, I have been GLUED to the TV, watching the nail-biting (I use those italics advisedly) sing-off to choose Britain's entry for that red-letter event in every music-lover's calendar, the Eurovision Song Contest. My French readers should be proud to hear that one of their countrywomen, the very pretty and silver-tonsilled Cyndi - who now appears to live in Wales, doubtless for a good reason - made it to the final two, beating off (frankly pretty poor) efforts from former Atomic Kitten Liz McClarnon and East17's Brian Harvey (a man who, lest we forget, once managed to run himself over). But once Scooch hit the stage, you knew it was all over. Choreography featuring drinks-trolleys, the emergency-exits routine and a steward asking "Would you like something to suck on landing, sir?" - well, it couldn't get much more camp, could it? Plus, there's a certain desperation about them. The girls have that hard-as-nails, "eyes 'n' teeth" glamour that comes from working on too many cruise ships, the blonde guy has obviously been hitting the biscuit barrel and the other fella would make the MC in Cabaret look butch. This is their last shot and they know it. Glorious, I love them. Watch it here - and roll on May 12 and U.K. victory. Mind you, not everyone agrees. Here's Matt's view of the proceedings :-) P.S. While we're on a showbiz note, guess who I bumped into on the Eurostar? Think tall, think Texan, think Tom and... well, I won't spoil it, send me your answers on a postcard...

Shirtless

Apparently, this photo was on the front page of the Daily Mail today (and rightly so in my opinion). What ON EARTH (my caps) is going on with Harry Potter?? And what's all this about a scene with a horse?? (Oooh, didn't I see that in Personal Trainers 4?). For the full story, do as I did and pay a visit to Aimless Ramblings of Zefrog. I DO love the theatre.

Sporting Life

December is almost upon us, dear reader. The nights are drawing in, the heating's on 'roasting' - why, it's even almost time to decorate the Christmas tree. And, after a mince pie or two, there's nothing Kitty and I like better to while away a long winter evening at Rhino75 Towers than a game of cat rugby (complete with made-to-measure ball). In this action shot, she's preparing to go for a conversion after scoring a try underneath the bookcase. Well, she's thinking about it anyway. We're still working on the scrum, though. Oh, ALRIGHT THEN, this ball is just one of the - completely useless - rugby freebies I stole received at a **glamorous beer-themed showbiz** dinner for the 2007 Rugby World Cup here on the Champs Elysées last night. Like every self-respecting "sports" fan, I was, of course, hoping for a Dieux du Stade 2007 calendar (look, the elastic's gone in that poor man's shorts - it happens to the best of us) but no such luck. Instead, there was a photo op with French team coach Bernard Laporte, a scarf, an ugly t-shirt and a book of old and less interesting (to my mind) rugby pics. But dinner was fab, particularly the big shank of lamb and the beer-flavoured ice creams (sounds ewww but they were actually quite subtle - the fig 'n' beer one was particularly nice, Ben & Jerry please note). In fact, this is shaping up to be a bit of a "dining out" week, as Monday evening found me sharing a table with fellow Parisian blogger Matoo. He didn't give me a scarf or an ugly t-shirt but he was totally charming, which is much better, isn't it? Smart guy, read him (but after me, he doesn't need the traffic as badly :))