Cyril in My Kitchen Part II

cyril in a pan, originally uploaded by rhino75.

After last year's failed attempt to get French TV chef Cyril Lignac round to Rhino75 Towers, imagine my surprise and delight, dear reader, when I came across these "celebrity" pans in my local department store. Admittedly, it's not quite the same as having him come round to cook for you, but at least you don't have to tidy up before getting him out of the cupboard. Plus, Kitty can sit on his face while I make dinner. So everyone's happy.

Special Offer

Look what I found outside BHV on my way to buy catfood yesterday, dear reader. And guess what? They were on special offer!! Naturally, I bought two. (Click on the pic for a close-up).

Rhino75's Product of the Week

Yes, I know, a NEW FEATURE. Exciting, isn't it? My plan is to bring you every week an EXCLUSIVE (my italics) through-the-keyhole glimpse of the exotica filling the cupboards at Rhino75 Towers. Week One: Dr. Stuart's Apple & Ginger Tea. Now, as many of you know, Rhino75 is a huge fan of Sweden and the frozen north in general. Any culture that can come up with Tyrkisk Peber vodka AND Agnetha Fältskog has to be doing something right, right?. Well, Dr. Stuart's magical beverage is Sweden in a cup. In fact, I'm pretty sure that Dr. Stuart's first name is Sven and that he's tall and blond with a fluffy beard under his white coat. Apples, ginger, cinnamon, just the brew for a cold winter's night. To be sipped wearing an H&M sweater, surrounded by candles (careful!), with possibly a little Carola or Roxette playing in the background. Underbara! If all goes to plan and I receive a lifetime's supply of said product from the manufacturer, next week I shall be featuring Cristal champagne. If not, probably my other great dietary staple, miso cup-a-soup. I know which one I'm rooting for. Ok, ok, this is a cheat post because this week so far has been all work and no play. Twelve-hour days, sore eyes, I haven't even had time to work on my new TV treatment ("Sergeant Kitty: Police Cat" - she sniffs all the evidence, rolls on bits of it and then...licks her bum? I need to work on the crime-solving angle a little more). Luckily, there IS some R&R lined up for the weekend, otherwise I'd go bonkers. And I've now got a ticket to see my new faves in London next month. TGIF.

Double Whammy

• Morrissey in Eurovision Talks (BBC): I know, I know, I love him too, but it would just be SO wrong, wouldn't it? After all he's done, I couldn't bear to see him finish behind some Maltese boyband. Because, as we all know, Eurovision is no great respecter of talent. I could just about cope with him writing it, but someone with a much more mainstream pop sensibility (I'm thinking Cathy Dennis) would be a better choice, I suspect. If you can hear me, Mr. Morrissey, DON'T DO IT, you don't need to. Ask Sandie.
• Apple Unveils iPhone (CNN): This, on the other hand, has got me virtually w*tting my pants. One can only hope that it will be astronomically expensive so that people will gasp even more loudly when I whip it out. Because, naturally, there's NO WAY I'll be able to survive without one. Whaddya mean I've just bought a new phone? This is not about technology people, this is about lifestyle, this is about living the dream. Help me, Naomi Klein.
  

Gift Horse

Dontcha just hate Christmas shopping? I swear if one more person barges into me with their bags, I'll go postal. And it's not just the present buying. Yesterday I spent 35 minutes (35 - count 'em), queuing for these blasted things. Yes, yes, my own fault, but He-Who-Shall-No- Longer-Be-Named-On -This-Blog (HWSNLBNOTB) had told me they'd brought out some **NEW** flavours for Christmas, including an apple and cinammon one that, frankly, has a direct line to the Nordic gene in my DNA soup. Dee-lish, though probably NOT worth a 35-minute wait. But it's not all bad. I was coming up the escalator in Lafayette Maison - my second home - when all of a sudden the guy in front of me turned round and asked me what I'd like for Christmas - "within reason, of course". Totally threw me. I would love to tell you that I shot back with some witty rejoinder, but no. I blushed and stammered, "ooh, ooh" and when he insisted, I went all stiff and polite (like a true Englishman) and said "I have everything I need, thank you." What a dork. Me, I mean. Mind you, though obviously generous (always a nice trait so +10 points), he wasn't that hot (-5, shame), and I suspect he's been drinking (par for the course). I don't know how I do it but I am a Class A nutter magnet - I should bottle it.

Choco-holic

I'm addicted to chocolate - LG Chocolate. Yes, yes, I know, "mindless consumerism" could be my middle name but just look at it - isn't it beautiful? Can't you hear it calling to you? Actually, some of you CAN hear it calling you, at no extra charge. That's how generous I am. And look, it even comes with its own holder (though the red shirt is extra). It's Friday and I'm in love.